The Myth of the Strong Mom: Why Supermom Culture Is Burning Us Out
Let’s talk about her—the "strong mom."
The one who never complains. The one who bounces back after birth, keeps the house together, juggles work and kids like it’s nothing, and somehow still remembers everyone’s shoe size, snack preferences, and spirit week themes.
You probably know her. You might be her.
And if you are? This blog post is for you.
Because somewhere along the way, we turned strength into silence.
We made "holding it all together" the expectation. We praised moms for doing everything instead of asking, why should they have to?
This one’s for the moms who are tired of being strong—and ready to just be.
When Strength Starts to Hurt
Being a "strong mom" can feel like a badge of honor. You’re capable. You get it done. You survive the hard days without falling apart.
But over time, that strength can turn into something heavier:
You don’t ask for help because you’re used to being the helper.
You feel like you should be able to manage everything.
You put your needs last, then feel guilty for even having them.
You dismiss your own feelings because someone else "has it worse."
Sound familiar?
This kind of strength isn’t empowering—it’s exhausting. And it can lead to something deeper than tiredness: burnout.
What Burnout Really Feels Like (Especially for Moms)
Burnout in motherhood doesn’t always look like falling apart. Sometimes, it looks like:
Snapping over the little things
Feeling numb or disconnected
Dreading your day before it even starts
Struggling to make basic decisions
Crying in secret (or not crying at all because you’re just that shut down)
You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. You’re burned out.
This is where real mental health support for burnout comes in—support that sees the emotional labor you’re carrying and says, "You don’t have to do this alone."
Why It’s So Hard to Step Out of the Strong Mom Role
The "strong mom" identity often starts early. Maybe you had to grow up fast. Maybe you were the dependable one. Maybe you learned to suppress your needs to keep the peace.
So when motherhood arrives, that script continues:
You take pride in doing it all.
You feel uncomfortable receiving help.
You don’t want to burden others.
You think, “If I just push a little harder, it’ll get better.”
But pushing harder doesn’t ease the weight. It just buries you deeper.
What If Strength Meant Something Else?
What if strength looked like:
Saying "no" without guilt
Asking for help without shame
Crying when things feel hard
Letting go of perfection
Admitting, “I’m not okay right now”
This isn’t weakness. This is courage. This is healing. And this is the kind of support I offer in my work as a therapist in Ohio—especially through therapy intensives in Ohio for mothers who feel like they’ve reached their limit.
Humor Break: Things Only "Strong Moms" Will Understand
You’ve eaten the kids’ leftover mac and cheese for lunch three days in a row and called it "self-care."
You’ve hidden in the laundry room with a granola bar just to get five minutes alone.
You’ve had a full meltdown over the dishwasher being loaded “wrong.”
Sound familiar? You're not alone. You’re just human.
How Therapy Intensives Help Moms Who Are Burned Out
Sometimes, weekly therapy just scratches the surface. When you’re holding so much, you need more than a 50-minute window squeezed between drop-offs and meetings.
Therapy intensives give you space to exhale.
As a Columbus, Ohio therapist, I offer full-day or half-day intensives that allow you to:
Process the root of your overwhelm
Work through trauma or old belief patterns
Learn practical nervous system regulation tools
Reconnect with the parts of you that feel lost
It’s not a bootcamp. It’s a soft landing.
We use somatic therapy, EMDR, and real-life tools that actually help you cope—especially when there’s no village, no break, and no pause button.
Practical Ways to Dismantle the Strong Mom Myth in Your Life
You don’t have to book a therapy intensive (though you totally can!) to start rewriting your story. Here are a few ways to practice something different:
1. Ask, "What do I need today?"
Start with this one question each morning. Don’t skip over it. Don’t override it. Don’t turn it into a to-do list for everyone else.
Even if the answer is “quiet” or “to be touched less”—honor it.
2. Set One Tiny Boundary
Maybe it’s telling your partner you need 10 minutes to decompress after work. Maybe it’s ignoring texts after 8 PM. Maybe it’s saying no to that third weekend event.
Tiny boundaries make big change.
3. Drop One Ball (On Purpose)
Let something go. Don’t return the library books on time. Use paper plates. Skip the bath. Lower the bar. Then watch the world not fall apart.
4. Let Your Kids See You Rest
You are not just a giver. You’re a person. When your kids see you take care of yourself, they learn to do the same. That’s powerful.
5. Name the Old Messages
Write them down:
“I have to do it all.”
“I’m the responsible one.”
“If I ask for help, I’m failing.”
Then cross them out. Replace them with something softer. Something truer.
6. Celebrate the Little Wins
Did you brush your teeth today? That's a win. Made it through the school drop-off without losing your cool? That counts. Texted a friend back after three weeks? Gold star.
You're doing more than enough.
Gentle Reframes for the Over-functioning Mom
“I’m not doing enough” → “I’m doing more than anyone should have to.”
“I shouldn’t need help” → “Getting help is wise, not weak.”
“Other moms are handling it” → “I don’t know their full story. I just know mine needs more care.”
You are allowed to want more support. You are allowed to rest. You are allowed to stop being the "strong one."
A Personal Note From a Therapist in Ohio
If you’re reading this and feeling raw—if you’re realizing just how heavy this has been—it’s okay.
You’re not alone.
You’re not failing.
You’re just trying to survive in a world that praises overfunctioning and undervalues caregivers.
You're trying to survive in a world that feels like it is upside down these days.
There is help. Real help. Not just advice, but actual support.
Whether that’s weekly therapy, a one-day therapy intensive in Ohio, or a quiet moment of honesty—you’re allowed to begin again.
Let go of the strong mom script.
You don’t have to be everything for everyone. You don’t have to hold it all together.
You just have to be you.
And I'm always here to remind you that that is more than enough.
