What No One Tells You About Breastfeeding After a C-Section or Birth Trauma
You’ve probably seen the breastfeeding posters, the pump ads, and the Instagram posts about “the magic of the latch.”
But if you’re someone who had a C-section or experienced birth trauma, you know the reality doesn’t always look like that. And maybe you’ve wondered: Is it just me? Why does this feel so much harder than everyone said it would?
It’s not just you. Breastfeeding after a difficult birth can be a completely different experience and one that too few people talk about.
As a Columbus, Ohio therapist who supports moms through therapy intensives and ongoing care, I work with women navigating the complex layers of recovery, identity, and parenting. And this one? It hits deep.
Let’s talk about what really happens, and how to get the support you deserve.
When the Plan Shifts
You may have had a vision for your birth. You may have pictured the skin-to-skin, the golden hour, the peaceful latch. Then reality showed up with a detour: a C-section. A traumatic delivery. A NICU stay. And suddenly you’re not only trying to keep a tiny human alive, you’re also trying to process what just happened to you.
It’s disorienting. It’s overwhelming. And it matters.
Because when your body has just been through a major medical event, or a deeply emotional one, asking it to also perform a function that’s complex and demanding (hi, breastfeeding) can feel like too much.
Breastfeeding is a relationship and not a performance. You and your baby are figuring it out together. It's not a measure of your worth.
What No One Tells You
Here are a few truths I wish more moms knew:
Breastfeeding after a C-section hurts in different ways. You might be recovering from surgery, adjusting to a new feeding position to avoid pain, or struggling to get comfortable while healing.
Your milk might take longer to come in. Especially after a C-section, there’s often a delay. Cue the panic and the pressure.
Touch can feel overwhelming. Especially after birth trauma, even loving touch, like a baby latching, can trigger feelings of discomfort, fear, or even dissociation.
You might feel disconnected. From your body. From the process. From the experience you thought you were going to have.
You might feel like a failure. And I want to be really clear here: you’re not.
There’s no shame in struggling. There’s no weakness in needing support.
The Invisible Load
Breastfeeding isn’t just a physical task. It’s emotional. Mental. Relational. It brings up:
Body image issues (especially after surgery)
Anxiety about milk supply
Pressure to “do it right”
Guilt about supplementing or stopping
Confusion when what you’re feeling doesn’t match what you were told
It’s okay if breastfeeding doesn’t feel like bonding at first. It’s okay if it feels like work. It’s okay if it brings up tears instead of joy.
You’re not broken. You’re healing.
Trauma Can Show Up During Breastfeeding
If your birth felt out of control, unsafe, or violating in any way, those feelings can show up again during breastfeeding.
Some signs you might be dealing with unresolved birth trauma:
Feeling anxious or panicky during nursing or pumping
Numbness or zoning out
Feeling trapped, helpless, or angry
Avoiding certain positions or routines
Flashbacks or intrusive thoughts
Your body remembers...even if your mind is trying to move on. That doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human. And it means your nervous system may need extra care and support.
Where Therapy Comes In
You don’t have to power through. You don’t have to keep telling yourself, “This should be easier.” If you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, shut down, or stuck...therapy can help.
I work with moms every day who are carrying invisible weight: the birth experience they’re still replaying, the breastfeeding struggles they’re afraid to name, the guilt they can’t seem to shake.
Sometimes weekly sessions are enough. But for some, therapy intensives offer deeper, faster relief. In a therapy intensive in Ohio, we can:
Process your birth story without shame
Use EMDR to target trauma responses and reduce triggers
Create body-based tools to regulate during feeding or pumping
Explore what you want feeding to look like...free from pressure or “shoulds”
It’s not about doing it all perfectly. It’s about feeling safe and supported as you figure out what’s best for you.
If You’re Feeling This Way, You’re Not Alone
Let’s get honest. If breastfeeding after birth trauma or a C-section has made you feel:
Touched out
Grief-stricken
Disconnected from your body
Resentful of your partner
Isolated from other moms
You’re not the only one. So many women carry this pain silently, thinking they’re the only ones struggling.
You’re not.
A Few Things That Might Help
1. Try different feeding positions
Laid-back nursing, football hold, or side-lying can reduce discomfort and give your body some relief.
2. Use affirmations or mantras
Try repeating: “This is a choice, not an obligation.” or “I’m doing what I can with the body I have today.”
3. Take breaks
It’s okay to hand the baby off. To pump. To supplement. You are allowed to protect your mental health.
4. Acknowledge the loss
Even if breastfeeding is going well now, it’s okay to grieve the version of it you thought you’d have. Grief and gratitude can exist together.
5. Talk to someone
Whether it’s a therapist, a lactation consultant, or a friend who gets it, you don’t have to carry this alone.
You’re Not Failing, You’re Healing
Breastfeeding after a C-section or birth trauma is a layered experience. You’re recovering physically, mentally, and emotionally, all while keeping a tiny human alive. That’s not small. That’s monumental.
If you’re finding it hard to catch your breath, to feel like yourself, or to feel anything at all, you’re not alone. And you don’t have to stay stuck.
As a Columbus, Ohio therapist who specializes in therapy for mothers and therapy intensives in Ohio, I’m here to walk with you through the messy, beautiful, complicated parts of motherhood.
Let’s untangle what’s hurting so you can feel more like you again.
You’re doing more than enough. And you deserve more support...not less.
