Daylight Savings and Dysregulation: Why Moms Feel Extra Exhausted
TL;DR: It is Thursday and we fell back on Sunday. Your nervous system and your child’s nervous system are still catching up. The shift messes with light cues that set sleep, appetite, mood, and focus, which is why kids are waking earlier and everyone feels grumpier. Expect 7 to 14 days of extra crankiness, odd wake times, and bigger feelings. Treat this as a recovery window: morning light, protein at breakfast, short movement bursts, a “quiet minute” in the afternoon, and a simpler, slightly earlier bedtime. If old triggers feel sharper, that is biology plus history. Small nervous system resets and kind expectations work better than trying to force a perfect schedule.
This is Thursday-brain after a clock jump.
If you have had a strange week, same. You pour the milk into the pantry. Your child cries because the banana peeled incorrectly. Your patience is measured in grains of rice. We changed the clocks on Sunday and your body is still negotiating with gravity. The circadian system runs on light and rhythm. Daylight Savings rearranges both, so your brain is trying to guess when to release melatonin, when to raise cortisol, and when to hold your eyelids open. Meanwhile you still have lunches to pack and a small person who thinks bedtime is a concept, not a plan.
None of this means you are failing. It means your biology is doing a clumsy two-step after someone moved the music.
Why the time change hits moms especially hard
You are managing two, maybe three or four circadian rhythms at once. Yours, your kid’s, your partner’s, and sometimes a dog with a very strict 6 a.m. policy. If one person sleeps badly, everyone’s day gets reshuffled. Also, the mental load does not take personal days. Permission slips still appear at 9 p.m. Soccer continues. The dishwasher waits for no one. So the time shift creates a perfect storm: lower energy, higher demands, and less room for recovery.
When we are tired, old patterns wake up. Maybe you swing into perfection mode and try to fix everything. Maybe you avoid all conflict because you have nothing left. Maybe your fuse gets short and you feel shame after bedtime. You are not broken. You are just out of rhythm.
A quick nervous system refresher that is actually useful
Your nervous system likes predictability. Light in the morning says wake. Dimness at night says rest. Repetition whispers safety. When the clock moves, your cues wobble. You do not need a lab-grade plan to fix this. You need a few consistent signals, repeated daily, so your system relearns the beat.
Think of this as a metronome for your body:
Morning light
Protein at breakfast
Small movement bursts
A quiet minute
Lower light in the evening
A gentle bedtime cue
That is it. The stack works because it talks to the parts of you that set rhythm, not just the parts that write lists.
The Thursday rescue plan you can actually do
Today is not the day for a complicated overhaul. Keep it simple and repeatable.
Morning anchors
Light within 30 minutes of waking. Open the blinds. Stand at a window. If you can step outside for 3 to 5 minutes, even better. Cloudy counts.
Protein-forward breakfast. Aim for 20 to 30 grams. Eggs, Greek yogurt, cottage cheese, tofu scramble, leftover chicken, or a smoothie with protein powder. Protein steadies blood sugar so your mood is not hitchhiking with your coffee.
Five minutes of movement. Stretch, march in place, or walk to the mailbox. Small moves wake the system without draining it.
Delay caffeine if you can. Even 30 minutes helps. Water first, then coffee.
Midday steadies
Two-minute bilateral reset. Sit or stand. Alternate tapping your thighs left, right, left, right while slowly looking side to side. Notice five things in the room.
A “quiet minute.” Set a 60-second timer. Breathe in for four, out for six. No problem solving. This is permission to reset, not a reward you have to earn.
Evening protectors
Start bedtime 10 to 15 minutes earlier. Keep the same routine order. Predictability beats perfection.
Dim the last hour. Lamps over overheads. Fewer tabs. A sudsy sink can count as white noise for your brain.
Anchor phrase at lights out. Try “This is enough for today.” Your body needs an off switch. Words can be a switch.
Pro tip for your expectations: choose two anchors and actually do them. Consistency beats enthusiasm every time.
Mini add-on: the “sundown scaries” are real
Many moms feel their stomach drop around late afternoon this week. You remember the newborn season when the sky went orange and your body braced for a long night of broken sleep. That memory lives in your nervous system. When the time changes and evenings feel different, your body can flash back and say “Uh oh.” You feel dread, impatience, or a rush to over-control bedtime. Nothing is wrong with you. Your brain is trying to keep you safe based on old data.
Try this quick “now-stamp” at dusk:
Orient: Name five things you see in the room. Present tense only.
Anchor: One hand on heart, one on belly. Long exhale.
Tell the truth: “I am safe.” “This is temporary.” “It makes sense that I am frustrated because this is hard.”
Choose one easy action: Turn on a lamp, start bath water, lay out pajamas. Action signals safety.
Nervous system reminders to say out loud
For you:
I am safe.
This is temporary.
It makes sense that I am frustrated because this is hard.
I can be grateful and exhausted. Both can be true.
We are a team.
For your view of your child:
He is a good kid having a tough moment.
We will get through this together.
This will not last forever. I can do this.
Say them out loud. Your body needs to hear your voice.
What this looks like with kids, in real life
I could say “put your child to bed earlier and avoid screens,” and you could reply with a slow blink while your toddler somersaults off the couch insisting pajamas are an insult. So let’s be practical.
Use light like a tool. Bright light after wake. Dim light after dinner. If your child treats lamps like enemies, make it a job. “You are our dimmer captain. Your job is to click the lights down.”
Move bedtime earlier by ten minutes for a few nights. If they still bounce, hold the earlier routine time anyway. Read on the couch in low light until the body catches up.
Feed the biology. Offer a small protein snack at bedtime this week. A bit of yogurt, milk, cheese, or nut butter on toast can reduce early wakes.
Give them a job. Kids fight less when they feel competent. Assign “timer helper,” “book chooser,” or “pajama picker.”
Regulation before correction. If your child is bouncing, meet the body first. Heavy work helps: wall push-ups, bear hugs if welcome, a 60-second “squeeze the pillow” game. Once the body settles, instructions land.
Your tone is the thermostat. Low, slow, fewer words. Save the lecture for Saturday at noon.
New: early wake-ups without tears
Set a green-light time. Use an OK-to-Wake clock or a simple visual timer. Start where you are. If 5:15 is common this week, set it for 5:45 and inch it later over a few days.
Keep the response boring and brief. Early wake-ups get water, bathroom, cuddle if needed, then back to quiet room. You are a soft-voiced lighthouse, not a morning show host!
Create a morning basket. Pre-approved quiet books or toys they can use until the clock changes. Rotate items to keep it novel.
Praise the process. In the morning: “You stayed in your room until the clock turned green. That helped your body rest.”
Tweak the room. Blackout curtains, white noise, their favorite stuffed animal. If they are scared, add a dim nightlight placed low and away from their face.
Scripts for the messy moments
For you
I can be grateful and exhausted. Both can be true.
Small resets count.
I am allowed to go slower when my body is tired.
I am safe. This is temporary. This too shall pass.
For your child
Your body is learning the new schedule. It's okay.
Feelings are welcome. Let's keep our bodies safe.
We can be mad and kind at the same time.
You are a good kid having a tough time. We will get through this together.
For your partner or support person
Please handle bedtime tonight. I will cover morning duty tomorrow.
I need validation right now more than solutions.
Can you take the dishwasher and backpacks so I can do a quiet minute before bed?
If you snap, repair after: “I raised my voice. That was not fair. You are not the problem. I am sorry. We will try again.”
Why everything feels louder right now
When sleep is short, emotions shout. Sugar cravings level up. The brain hunts for easy dopamine and quick certainty. That is why your phone starts to look like a portal to a better universe and why the request for water at bedtime feels personal. Also, tired bodies do not filter sensory input well. Noise is noisier. Touch feels bigger. Messes grow fangs.
You cannot control the biology. You can control the inputs and your expectations. You can also give yourself credit for every single tiny thing that helps. A sip of water before you answer a question. A five-minute walk. Saying “I need a minute” instead of pushing through. That is real work.
Pockets that buy you back energy
Batch low-lift meals. Rotisserie chicken plus bagged salad. Eggs and toast. Pasta with olive oil and a frozen veggie. You do not get bonus points for complicated.
Let something drop. Cancel the extra errand. Delete the craft you saved that requires a glue gun and three extra hours. Team paper plates is a team for a reason.
Use your future self. Put tomorrow’s kid outfit in a basket near the toothbrush. Make a “morning bin” with hairbrush, elastics, and sunscreen so you are not trekking across the house.
Create one recharge ritual. It can be tiny. Tea you only drink at night. A five-minute shower with the door locked. The podcast that makes you snort-laugh while you fold.
If you are feeling more triggered than usual
Time changes can wake up old grief or fear. Maybe last fall was hard. Maybe a season of newborn sleep deprivation still lives in your bones. EMDR Therapy helps process the stuck pieces so your baseline activation comes down. That might look like bedtime resistance no longer sending you into panic, or a messy kitchen not feeling like a referendum on your worth. It is real relief, not just pep talks.
If you notice thoughts like “I can never get this right,” or “I have to do it all or it falls apart,” that is a clue that history is speaking. Your present-day self deserves a louder microphone.
Troubleshooting the common snags
I keep snapping at bedtime.
Add a five-minute buffer before the routine. Water, shake out your hands, breathe out longer than you breathe in. Put your phone in another room. Ask your partner to spot you for two minutes.
I wake at 3 a.m. and cannot get back to sleep.
Think calm wake window. Bathroom. Small sip of water. Box breathing. No bright lights. No problem solving. Back to bed. If you truly cannot sleep, read something boring on paper for ten minutes with a dim light, then try again.
My kid treats bedtime like a triathlon.
Use a visual routine chart with 5 to 6 pictures. Set a gentle timer for each step. Offer choices that do not derail you: “Pajamas first or teeth first.” You are the track, not the train.
They wake at 5 and are done sleeping.
Hold the green-light boundary. Offer quiet room time with a morning basket. Add a protein bedtime snack the night before and try again.
They are terrified at night.
Validate first. “It feels scary. I am here.” Keep the comfort ritual the same each night. Predictable reassurance lands deeper.
A Friday nudge and a weekend plan
Friday
Keep wake time within 30 minutes.
Get outside in the morning again, even if it is five cloudy minutes.
Keep the earlier bedtime if moods and mornings improved.
Protect one small pocket of alone time. A quiet minute counts.
Weekend
Light anchors. Outside both mornings. Short walk if possible.
Food anchors. Protein at breakfast and lunch. Snacks within reach so you are not foraging like a raccoon at 4 p.m.
Schedule anchors. Fewer extras. Say no to the thing that sounds like a good idea but will drain you.
Sleep anchors. Calm, repetitive bedtime. Same order. Lower lights. Gentle tone.
By Monday your system should feel less wobbly. If it does not, that is data, not failure. Keep the anchors and get curious about stress load and support.
Gentle truths to keep in your pocket
Gratitude does not cancel exhaustion.
Messy days can still be good days.
Good moms set boundaries. Great moms keep them.
Simple is a skill. Practice it.
This is temporary. You can do this.
Final Thoughts
If you want support through the transition or tools that actually fit your life, you can schedule a consultation through the link in bio. Abbie offers therapy for mothers in Columbus, Ohio using EMDR Therapy and therapy intensives in Ohio.
Ready to start reparenting with real support? I am a therapist for moms who specializes in EMDR Therapy. Schedule a consultation today.
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